One of the first steps to making life improvements is to acknowledge that you are the one responsible for the result of every action. You are in charge and you put everything into action (or inaction).
Sad, depressed, miserable all day long? Have you left the house? Have you received even a ray of sunshine? It’s easy to place blame on others for unfortunate events that have occurred in your life. But it’s difficult to look internally and identify which actions could have triggered those events. If a problem rises, look within first.
When my coworkers make mistakes or do unsatisfactory work, more often than not, I am the one at fault. I did not effectively communicate the task and its objectives and thus the coworker did not realize the importance of certain aspects.
Here is an except from Susan Heathfield’s thoughts:
- Listen to the voice in your head. Eliminate blame; eliminate excuses. If the blame track or the excuse track plays repeatedly in your mind, you are shifting responsibility for your decisions and life to others.
- Second, listen to yourself when you speak. In your conversation, do you hear yourself blame others for things that don’t go exactly as you want? Do you find yourself pointing fingers at your coworkers or your upbringing, your parent’s influence, the amount of money that you make, or your spouse? Are you making excuses for goals unmet or tasks that missed their deadlines? If you can hear your blaming patterns, you can stop them.
- Third, if an individual you respect supplies feedback that you make excuses and blame others for your woes, take the feedback seriously. Control your defensive reaction and explore examples and deepen your understanding with the coworker or friend. People who responsibly consider feedback attract much more feedback.